Pulling the Plug on Mother

I knew the day would come. When you’re 90 years old, unexpected things can happen. I had to pull the plug on Mother this week. (Click on any photo to make it larger.)

Let’s back the bus up

Her yard has a woods on the east side and rows of trees on the north and west sides. The neighbors and the fire station across the street all have trees. She thinks she has some kind of leaf magnet in her yard that attracts every leaf in the block.

It disturbs her.

Me, I’d say it was God’s plan to recycle the nutrients, and I’d leave ’em there.

She, however, wants them gone.

Taking the Murray for its last ride

Fortunately, the back yard butts into a no mans land that used to be a steep hill and cow pasture, so if she can chase the leaves that far, they go down where they’ll eventually fill up a gully in another hundred or two hundred years.

I left the other day and she was blowing leaves on the east yard. That’s pretty easy. She only has to blow the leaves about 75 feet to get them out of the yard on that side.

When I came back, she had started on the upper level of the back yard. I noticed that she was looking a bit tuckered out, so I offered to take over (knowing, of course, that my offer would be indignantly rebuffed). I left to run some other errands.

This time, I found that she had the 100-foot extension cord, plus the 25-footer, and was attacking the lower level of the back yard. Deciding that it was time for drastic action, I reached where the long cord plugged into the short cord and gave a yank. Within seconds, there was silence in the back yard. I had pulled the plug on Mother.

Putting up a brave front

I think even she knew it was time. She didn’t protest when I started coiling up the power cords and hauling them off.

But, that’s not the end of what happened this week. She was giving the yard what she thought would be one last cutting of the season (plus sending leaves off to leaf heaven) when she complained that “it’s not blowing.” I figured she had probably thrown the belt that spins the blades, cutting the grass and mulching the leaves.

When I went to thread it on, one of the pulleys kept popping off its shaft. When I took off the shroud that covered it, I discovered that the shaft wasn’t the same shape all the way up; it came to a point. At some point, the thing that held the pulley to the shaft had come off, the pulley had started grinding away at the shaft until it looked like a bad tooth. I wish I had taken a picture of it.

“Goodbye, Faithful Servant”

It was time to call Brother-in-Law John Perry. He’s seen and done it all when it comes to fixing things. He’d just never seen anything like THIS before. We loaded up a mess of parts and headed out to see Jake the Lawnmower Guy. He, too, had a Maude Moment – “Hey, Maude, Come here. Bet you ain’t never seen anything like this before.”

He pulled out his calculator. Well, this is Missouri. He pulled out a pad of paper and a pencil and started writing down part numbers and getting more excited all the time. He could just see himself out on the Lake of the Ozarks in his new bass boat.

Finally, tearing up his parts list, he said, with the images of the bass boat fading away, “I have a couple of used mowers you might want to take a look at.”

Taking it easy on first lap

I went back to Mother and said, “I have the solution to your lawnmower problem and it’s only gonna cost a quarter.”

“A quarter,” she said. “What can you do to it for a quarter?”

“Well, if I can borrow a gun from John, I can buy a bullet for about a quarter and I think shooting it is about the only course of action that makes sense.”

Vrooooom! Vroooom!

After complaining that the new mower operated differently than the old one – “I won’t know what to do with my left foot. The old mower had the clutch on the left…” – she bought a used Troy-Bilt 21-horsepower, 46-inch mower. Her old one only cut 36 inches and had 11 horses hitched to it. (I can hear her complaining about the cost of feed already, not to mention having to build a bigger barn.)

The new mower has modern safety features. If you put it in reverse, the mower blades stop. If you lift up off the seat, the mower blades stop. If you come completely OFF the seat, the mower blades stop and the motor dies. Keeps you from being run over if you’re ejected.

She needs rocks in her pockets

The only catch is that mother weighs about 72 pounds. I noticed that the blades kept kicking out. I watched her awhile and figured out that she’s so light that every time she hits a bump, the seat flies up just enough to engage the safety interlock and kill the blades. We’re either going to have to fatten her up or make her keep a concrete block in her lap.

Not bad, thought, for someone who had to overcome adversity.

2011 Birthday Season Party

Saturday night, we held a 90th Birthday Season celebration for Mother’s friends and family. This gallery of photos is probably of interest mostly to the folks who were there or people who know us. I promise we’ll get back to more general interest stuff soon. There are some good stories in the pipeline. (Thanks to Son Matt and Brother David for shooting some of these.)

Birthday Season Photo Gallery

Click on any image to make it larger, then click on the left or right side to move through the gallery.

2011 Birthday Season Day 1

This is Mother’s 90th Birthday Season. David, Diane and Amy Steinhoff came in from Tulsa; Kim Steinhoff-Tidsale and daughters Brynn and Taylor came in from Denver (Casey is due Saturday); Wife Lila and I arrived from WPB (she flew; I drove); Adam, Carly and Graham Steinhoff flew in from West Palm Beach; Matt, Sarah and Malcolm drove up from Palm Beach Gardens. Mark is coming in from St. Louis Saturday.

This is the biggest gathering of Steinhoffs ever. We can no longer hold a family reunion in a phone booth.

Mother had hair appointment

We knew Mother had a hair appointment at 10, so I was given the task of putting out the word as soon as she left the driveway. Within minutes, the whole clan camped out on the porch to surprise her. We waited and waited and waited. Someone suggested that we REALLY surprise her by leaving a message saying that we had all decided to go to lunch. (We carefully noted the name of that person for when it comes time to update the will.)

When the honoree finally arrived, there was much hugging and a few wet eyes. Most of that action was captured in a video for later editing. With the surprise out of the way, there was a general agreement that we were hungry.

A motion to head to Wib’s BBQ in Jackson was made and passed. We took over the joint.

Friendly waitress grabbed camera

A friendly waitress offered to take a photo so I could be in at least one picture. I checked out how close she was to the nearest exit and tried to remember if I had ever stiffed her for a tip, then decided to relinquish my Nikon. She did a pretty good job.

We’re a wired family

Carly and Matt stay connected with the world while Graham exhibits his excitement.

Don’t want to miss anyone

This shot of Amy, Adam, Sarah and the back of Diane’s head insures that everyone is in at least one photo. I want to make sure NOT to offend anyone who might be picking out my Old Folks’ Home in the future.

The fellow in the cap in the background was not part of our gathering.

Missouri Conservation Center great for kids

We decided the kids needed to burn off some energy, so we headed to North County Park, figuring we’d hit the playground.

I suggested we spend a few minutes in the Missouri Conservation Center. The kids and adults loved it.

Malcolm liked building things out of blocks made from tree branches. Then, he and the girls and David were fascinated by a live bee hive with bees flying in and of the hive through a transparent tube in the wall. Malcolm spent 20 minutes trying to spot the queen. David was curious about how long a honey bee lived. (About six weeks per Matt’s Googling.) Since we had seen bees flying around in the butterfly garden out front, Malcolm was able to really made the connection between flowers, bees and honey.

David’s hidden talents

Right next to the block area was a small puppet stage. David started pulling out animal puppets and coming up with an elaborate story about who they were and how they interacted, ending up with a tale about a skunk.

When he finished to a standing ovation (actually, everybody wanted to see another exhibit, so they stood up to leave), I looked behind the stage to see if he had been reading from a script. I am proud to report that he was ad libbing.

Audience was rapt and appreciative

You can tell from the expressions that he did a great job.

We’ll more than likely report on other events. By Sunday, folks will be catching planes and scattering back to their homes.

We’re going to make an effort to get together like this more often. After all, we’d all come together for a funeral. Why not celebrate living instead?

Water Plant Goldfish Pond

I scanned a really cool photo of my mother on top of Cape Rock. Then, I looked closely at the photo next to it and recognized it as the fountain in the small park just north of the water plant on Cape Rock Drive. I’m going to guess the photos were taken in the early 1940s. [Click on  the photos to make them larger.]

Aerial of Cape Rock and the water plant today

Here’s an aerial I shot last November of the area. The water plant is in the center, The small park with the fountain is directly across the street. The towboat is pushing barges off Cape Rock. The Country Club golf course is at the top left.

“Outstanding example of good taste”

A May 21, 1931, Page One Missourian story gushed, “A project of the Better Service Club…might be described as one outstanding example of good taste in landscaping and beautification in this city… Situated on the brow of a wooded ravine just north of the site to be occupied by the new $250,000 water plant, the rock garden and its central fountain forms an attractive background to the woodland.

This garden was built for the employees by Judge I.R. Kelso of the Utilities company… The cost of lighting the place and planting it to flower and shrubbery will be borne by the employees, who will also maintain the project.”

Has electric fountain

“A feature of this garden spot is an electric fountain, the only one of its kind as far as is known in Southern Missouri. Four huge stone pillars form an entrance to this small park, two of the pillars being located at each end of the park and containing an ornamental lamp, and two others forming a support for a proposed illuminated sign.

The large pool, including the fountain, forms the central structure of the garden. The entire garden is bounded by an attractive design of stone arranged in a tasteful manner under the supervision of Tony Haas. Around the edge of the large pool a walk has been constructed, leading from the entrance, and on the inside of the walk is a concrete, rock and brick trough for water planting. The fountain will be a bowl-shaped affair, with a circular spray which can be adjusted to a diameter from seven to 70 feet. A center spray will be forced about 20 feet high.”

[Note: I read in another account that the pool was shaped to resemble a light bulb, keeping with the utility theme.]

Night illumination

“Around the base of the fountain beneath the water surface a sealed case contained lights of seven different colors will be arranged to give a vari-colored illumination to the sprays from the fountain, forming a beautiful spectacle at night. Four floodlights concealed in the entrance pillars will also play on the fountain.”

Sun dial and crystal ball planned

“North of the pool will be a sun dial and a crystal ball will also be included in the arrangement. A pleasing feature of the beautification plans is the retaining of much of the native growth of the site. A large tree and smaller trees have been left growing at advantageous points in the garden.

“It is the plan of the employees to landscape an adjacent plot of ground to the park and provide a recreation center which will include tennis courts and other similar facilities.”

Almost lost?

I could swear that I read somewhere that the park was almost lost not too long ago but a land swap was worked out. I’ve looked through all my bookmarks and couldn’t find the story again. The good news is that is still looks much like it did in the 40s and will, hopefully, be there for many more generations.

Missourian photographer Fred Lynch and I compared notes one day about how many times we had relied on that fountain for weather wild art.